I am available as a buddy. See my profile for details. I think reaching out to others, and others reaching out will help us all through this heartbreaking time. I just have this feeling that as much as I feel I need help to get through, I need to do the same for another, in that way helping myself. My parents were both all about being selfless and I aspire to be like them. I am 40, 2 kids, 2 dogs, and a cat.

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heather

01/06 mom, brought to hosp b/c of flu....found mass on left lung.
had 2 biopsies, 2nd confirmed nsclc, stage IIIB.
did radiation, chemo, brought to sk cancer center in nyc. too weak to take the chemo recommended. severe throat pain, weight loss, weakness. started on carbo & cisplatin, lung tumor reduced by 1/3.

11/06 - confusion, slurring of speech, loss of balance, admitted to hosp for brain mets x 3. WBR showed improvement in symptoms within 7 days...mom is coming back! also started tarceva.
11/24/06 - mom released from hosp, she is weak but has her wits back
12/22/06 - moms pet scan shows mets to liver (increased by 50%, heart, and several more lymph nodes in abdomen. Tarceva stopped, getting ready for alimpta (b12 & folic acid).
12/27/06 - 2 more days to alimpta....i gave up hope for a time but this message board has brought me back!
12/29/06 mom receives alimpta...
12/31/06 brought mom to the doctor for SOB & extreme fatigue...doctor says there is a battle between cancer and chemo...
01/03/07 mom brought by ambulance to hospital for SOB (short of breath). fluid around heart drained and liver, kidneys begin failing....we prayed for a miracle.
01/10/07 i stayed with mom at the hospital the entire time, slept with her too. mom passed very peacefully at 2:35 pm on 1/10/07 with me and my daughter by her side. i will miss her forever. OH MOM, I MISS AND LOVE YOU SO!
2/16/42 - 9/10/07: My dad, my hero and champion. The smartest man I ever knew. A rare Type I diabetes survivor for 47 years. Another terrible terrible disease. Oh dad, oh dad. I miss them both beyond words. I cant get my mind around the fact that they are gone.
my best advice, my only advice: dont think, just do.